The Absent-Minded Professor
I've officially lost it. Exhibit A:
Yesterday, I could not find my car keys. Could. Not. Find. Them. I'm rummaging through every conceivable pocket in my purse - every little nook and cranny in that stupid bag that always seems too small until I can't find something and then it's this massive black hole.
I begin the "stinkin' thinkin'" (thank you, Stuart Smalley) that goes, "Gob, why do I lose everything?! Every. damn. thing. What is WRONG with me? Why can't I be more organized? I don't just need a sippy cup, I need a string to put my keys on so I can wear them around my neck. I suck."
And then, I realize, I don't need to freak out about not being able to find my car keys, because . . . they are in the ignition and I am driving.
Yesterday, I could not find my car keys. Could. Not. Find. Them. I'm rummaging through every conceivable pocket in my purse - every little nook and cranny in that stupid bag that always seems too small until I can't find something and then it's this massive black hole.
I begin the "stinkin' thinkin'" (thank you, Stuart Smalley) that goes, "Gob, why do I lose everything?! Every. damn. thing. What is WRONG with me? Why can't I be more organized? I don't just need a sippy cup, I need a string to put my keys on so I can wear them around my neck. I suck."
And then, I realize, I don't need to freak out about not being able to find my car keys, because . . . they are in the ignition and I am driving.
Labels: Baby's First Breakdown
posted by Teacher lady | 2:43 PM
12 Comments:
Hee! I just spit out my soda from laughing.
Huh. And I was blaming stuff like that on Mommy Brain. Maybe it happens after being exposed to scatter-brained adolescents?
I was wandering around yesterday looking for my shoes. I circled the house twice looking for them, and finally my son told me to check my feet.
My son is 2, and the shoes were on my feet. Yeah, one of my better moments.
Hee. You're not gonna believe this but just today I was in the car, digging through my bag for my cell phone so I could tell the mister I was stopping to get something to eat on my way home.
I was frantic, thinking I had lost it (the phone, I mean, ha ha) when I realized I was ON the phone. I had it in my hand, up to my ear and everything. The pizza place had put me on hold and I just ... forgot, I guess? Jeez.
I... have nothing. That is hilarious, though! Blame it on the perimenopause. You're becoming your own designated mess, Teacher Lady, next thing you know you'll be searching the bottoms of kegs and the blouses of cheerleaders for a stapler!
i was driving around all day recently and cursing that i couldn't find my sunglasses. then i got home and looked in the mirror. they were on my head the whole time!
Nice.
I've looked for my glasses before and realized I'M WEARING THEM.
(Perhaps I should consider writing my name on my underwear in case I ever get lost without my ID?)
I take it back, Rachel, I do that all the time! Like daily. Like they're on top of my head right now.
That's hilarious. LOLOLOL
Thanks for dropping by!!!
Ahhhhh... So nice to know that I am not alone...
Now, if only you can remember where you were driving to!
lol...I LOVE LOVE LOVE stories like this. Stuff like that happens to me all the time.
Excellent. I am not a total retard, or if I am, at least I am in good company.
Oh ha ha, I have "lost" my keys that way, too!! I have also "lost" my toddler when he was riding on my shoulders. Jeez!
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