I am. So over. This semester.
This will be brief. But first, a question: Do they let inmates blog in prison? Or the insane asylum?
And also: Is it too much to ask of you (yes, YOU siblings in the back of the classroom) that if you're going to indicate your complete and total disdain for the subject matter of the day that you COVER your mouths when you perform those giant, exaggerated lion in the savanna yawns? You look like you're auditioning for the road company of The Lion King at best and trying to catch a fly, at worst. I've seen enough of your tonsils to last me the rest of my life, thanks.
Next, here is what I propose: I propose a ban on any and all siblings taking classes together. Save yourselves the money and save me the aggravation and do this instead: Show up on the first day of class and get my syllabus. Be sure not to register. Then, plan to meet twice a week at the same time at the campus Starbucks. You can discuss each week's topic since you know so much about it that you clearly don't need me anyway. This way, we all win. I don't have to constantly stare, glare, loudly clear my throat and finally STOP teaching because the two of you won't shut yer yaps and you've saved several thousand dollars. See? Everybody's happy!
I will rant more in the next couple of days. In the mean time, I'm off to find a physician who will sell me Valium in the convenient, economy-sized bottle.
And also: Is it too much to ask of you (yes, YOU siblings in the back of the classroom) that if you're going to indicate your complete and total disdain for the subject matter of the day that you COVER your mouths when you perform those giant, exaggerated lion in the savanna yawns? You look like you're auditioning for the road company of The Lion King at best and trying to catch a fly, at worst. I've seen enough of your tonsils to last me the rest of my life, thanks.
Next, here is what I propose: I propose a ban on any and all siblings taking classes together. Save yourselves the money and save me the aggravation and do this instead: Show up on the first day of class and get my syllabus. Be sure not to register. Then, plan to meet twice a week at the same time at the campus Starbucks. You can discuss each week's topic since you know so much about it that you clearly don't need me anyway. This way, we all win. I don't have to constantly stare, glare, loudly clear my throat and finally STOP teaching because the two of you won't shut yer yaps and you've saved several thousand dollars. See? Everybody's happy!
I will rant more in the next couple of days. In the mean time, I'm off to find a physician who will sell me Valium in the convenient, economy-sized bottle.
Labels: Baby's First Breakdown, Manic Rants
posted by Teacher lady | 10:26 AM
3 Comments:
YES, please, let's institute that policy. I've got a set of siblings and one of their boyfriends in my class. They've all got fairly similar names and I cannot remember who is who without referring to my seating chart. (God help me if they move.) Plus they cheat. Gar!
I'm ready to be done with this semester, my students are ready to be done. Whether they are ready for the final is another issue. Once I had two frat brothers in my class. Gawd.
Hi, this is slightly off-topic but I read your blog regularly for the great stories about stupid students and academic culture. I work as a tutor/university placement consultant in Kazakhstan. I've put together a blog at http://english.zendurl.com/blog/Blog.html
and I'm trying to address things students should know about university life in the US. I would greatly appreciate your comments and suggestions, to try to make it relevant. Hope this request isn't out of place. In any case, I love your blog and it gives me hope that American students are just as clueless as my students sometimes!
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