I'm an Autistic Third Grader
I'm standing in the food line and fellow doc student behind me strikes up a conversation. Sometimes, I hate telling people what subject I teach. I need to come up with an alternate subject - a "teaching alias," if you will, for when I just don't want to get into it. Something boring that will make folks' eyes glaze over. I don't know, maybe "I teach the History of Accounting." But anyway, the fellow doc student handled the real answer pretty well. She replied, "Well, that must be a fun class to teach! How is summer session going for you?" I answered probably more than I should have - I was really just thinking out loud and I said, "I'm worried about my students. Half of them really tanked the midterm. Sometimes I think students take my class, expecting to get the world's easiest A. I'm guessing they think to themselves, 'Hey - I've had sex, so I know all there is to know. How hard can the class be?'" and fellow doc student laughed.
However. Another fellow doc student happened to be standing across from us and I guess I wasn't using my inside voice. She cleared her throat and said loudly enough for the whole room to hear (she definitely wasn't using her inside voice, but I think that was the point), "I work with autistic third graders and one of the things I have to practice with them are things that are appropriate to say in public and things that are not appropriate to say in public. And what you just said was a perfect example of something I would tell my autistic third graders is not appropriate to say in public."
Inappropriate? Moi? Not possible!
But seriously. Is there a polite, appropriate way to ask, "So when is your surgery scheduled? You know, the one where they remove the stick from your ass."
After the whole class took a shocked breath, followed by a nervous giggle, I said, "Well, I guess my perspective is a little different than the average person's. For example, I have no problem telling nosy people that the reason I don't have children is because my husband has an undescended testicle and my cervical mucus is hostile to his sperm." Class laughed heartily. Is it okay if I say, "One point, Teacher Lady," or did I just make the nearest autistic third grader look really socially savvy? Wait - no, don't care. One point, Teacher Lady.