Sex Ed in Higher Ed

College instructor teaching human sexuality rants about the dumbing down of America, the lost art of manners, grammar and (the perfect combination of both) the thank you note. Also includes random rants about life, pet peeves, and sometimes raves about favorite things.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Thanks, 'Cause I Was Confused

Has it come to this? Are Americans really that stupid?

I don't want to get into the hows and whys, but yes, we will be moving and yes, our house is on the market - new kitchen and everything (sobs, takes deep breath, exhales, reminds self not to kill spouse, etc.,)!

We had our first open house today and Minnie and I made ourselves scarce. We came home three hours later to find these little cards on everything. Next to the patio door: "Patio." Next to the cabinet: "Maple cabinet." On the steps going upstairs: "Carpeted Stairs." On the bookshelf in the bedroom: "Built-in Bookshelves." And my personal favorite, on the window seat: "Window Seat."

Are potential home-buyers that clueless??!? Like someone might walk into our bedroom, take one look at the window seat and say to spouse, "Hey - honey - what, what is that thing? It's next to the window and it's not quite a bench. I wonder if you could sit on it. What could it be?" And then, luckily, they see the computer-printed card and exhale a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank goodness - I was scared there, for a minute. Look at that little sign. Well, I'll be jiggered. It's a 'window seat.' How fascinating."

Stupid open houses.


Blogger Veronica Mitchell said...

Wow. I have never seen that. I think that must be one realtor's "special touch."

This weekend we are in the throes of renovation before listing, so you have all my sympathy.

August 13, 2006 5:26 PM  
Blogger Schietto Sister said...

Did the door have a label, too? Hopefully the realtor labeled all of the bathroom "things;" toilets are easily mistaken for . . . WHAT?

August 13, 2006 6:04 PM  
Blogger Art Nerd Lauren said...

I have a question about the realty business. Why is it that realtors have their photographs published on their cards? Do potential home-buyers really base their decision on looks? Of the jackass (who, apparently thinks that they are stupid) who's selling to/for them? I don't get realty at all.

August 13, 2006 7:47 PM  
Blogger ProfessorDog said...

I've been to a fair number of open houses, and I've never seen that. Weird. It reminds me of a high school language classroom, with everything labeled in the target language: fenetre. poubelle. crayon.

August 13, 2006 8:14 PM  
Anonymous susie said...

I can tell what that dog is thinking. "God, humans are SO STUPID."

August 13, 2006 8:43 PM  
Blogger Sue said...

I think your realtor has met some of your students. Bwahahahaha!

Seriously, I have never seen that before. Makes you wonder how in the world potential buyers ever figured out how to fill out a mortgage application.

August 13, 2006 9:38 PM  
Blogger liberalbanana said...

HA! That's the strangest thing I've ever heard and my mother is a realtor. A smarter-than-your-average-realtor realtor, I guess...Or rather a thinks-potential-homebuyers-are-
not-dumb-as-rocks realtor.

You know, Minnie could have a future in dog modeling! Look at how perfectly she's standing next to the sign! Impressive.

August 14, 2006 7:58 AM  
Blogger Shawnee said...

Just found your website a few days ago & am LMAO reading through your archives. Thank you for saving my sanity at work . . . which happens to be for a real estate & development company. First, yes, buyers (& some Realtors!) can be that stupid. Don't get me started. Second, Open Houses are a complete waste of time, helpful "I am a REFRIGERATOR" signs or no. But good luck selling your home! My house has been on the market for 208 DAYS in what is quite possibly the most depressed market in the country, so I know how inconvenient & infuriating (at least for me!) the process can be.

And for Lauren, believe it or not, some people DO choose their Realtor based on their photo. I actually had a woman call our office & ask why we did not have photos of all of our agents in the Homes Magazine. I politely explained that while other companies were busy promoting their agents, our company was using its advertising space & money to promote its listings. She interrupted me to ask, "But how am I supposed to know which Realtor to pick if I can't see a picture??" This job has been quite the education.

August 14, 2006 9:38 AM  
Blogger Fraulein N said...

Teacher Lady, think about all Designated Messes who will probably be grown-ups buying houses someday. They'll probably be just as clueless then as they are now. Joy.

August 14, 2006 10:51 AM  
Blogger ColoradoCastaway said...

That has got to be one of the stupidest things I've ever heard. putting up
signs ""BLOG"" to
let ""COMMENT"" potential
buyers know
what everyday objects are. you would think they would already know these things if they are house shopping.

August 14, 2006 12:21 PM  
Blogger Sarcomical said...

hmmm...that's a very "interesting" selling tactic.

August 14, 2006 3:14 PM  
Anonymous Drunkenspaniel said...

Houses sell quick and expensively in the UK, so no-one would bother to stop and read those little signs anyway!! It really sounds quite bizarre - no way would we do that here. I think the whole house-buying thing is completely different in the UK, becuase the owners usually help show potential buyers round their own house, so no-one cares what the Estate Agent looks like.

August 14, 2006 3:41 PM  
Blogger Liesl said...

What a sweet dog :)

My in-laws sold their house here in NJ last spring, and they lived with those signs everywhere for several weeks until a buyer came along. I thought it was kind of silly at the time, but I'm guessing from your experience these signs are the new marketing tools? Huh.

Best of luck finding a buyer soon - it's a real pain living on a realtor's schedule.

August 14, 2006 8:35 PM  
Blogger Mrs. T said...

Your poor dog looks completely aghast at that sign. As if we have all completely lost our minds.
Good luck with the sellin'. It's a roller coaster ride.

August 15, 2006 8:35 AM  
Blogger Katherine said...

Yea, and this is why in 6 years and 5 houses I have never once allowed a realtor to have an open house. I think it's just neighborhood looky loos and non-serious buyers. You want to see my house, fine, make an appointment!

August 15, 2006 12:55 PM  
Anonymous chicaloungin said...

Teacher Lady:

I am posting a similar scary tale about the American need for signs...

I had actually read your post a few days ago, laughed, and then today, running, rethought and revisited.


August 26, 2006 1:43 PM  

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