Sex Ed in Higher Ed

College instructor teaching human sexuality rants about the dumbing down of America, the lost art of manners, grammar and (the perfect combination of both) the thank you note. Also includes random rants about life, pet peeves, and sometimes raves about favorite things.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

New Series! How I Dated My Husband

So, if you were a fan of the How I Met My Husband Series, you know we last left off where I finally met Mr. J. - on an "I almost didn't go" blind date.

Was it a "love at first sight" thing? No. After my first marriage imploded, I decided that was a load of crap. But there were some cute things I noticed.

For example, I can't remember if I blogged about this but I have a bizarre phobia. Heights? Don't care. Snakes, rats, spiders? Don't want to be covered with them a la Fear Factor, but no big thing. Teacher Lady now shares the completely humiliating secret with you and you alone, Internetweb friends: Birds scare the shit out of me. I am really afraid of birds. I hate them with the white-hot heat of a thousand suns.

Steve and his wife loved birds. In fact, they had just rescued some African-gray thing that was very rare and just "the most loving bird ever." Just typing that made bile rise up in my throat. Won't be able to type about birds much longer . . .

Anyway, I shame-facedly told Steve about my little, uh, problem long before I went to his house. He was very kind and understanding (having a daughter not too much younger than me, he was probably well-acquainted with all kinds of crazy). They kept the birds in an upstairs bedroom, they would make sure they were all caged when I came over and wouldn't expect me to look at them. (The birds, not Steve and Suzanne).

Since Mr. J. was a good friend of Suzanne's and understood how much she loved her birds, one of the first things he said was, "May I see the birds?" and Suzanne said sure, she'd love nothing more!! Mr. J. looked at me and Steve came to the rescue. "Ah, Teacher Lady can't look at birds. (Gotta love Steve's way with words, right? Like I was Lot's wife and I'd turn into a pillar of salt if I looked at birds) She's afraid of them." I think I love that man more in this moment than I ever have. Because he didn't blink, or make a face, or roll his eyes or shake his head in some, "Women! Aren't they nuts?" kind of way. He just said, "Oh, okay. See you in a minute, then."

After some drinks and small talk, we headed for the restaurant - a cute little Chinese place I had never visited. We all chatted together. Sometimes Mr. J. and I chatted, just the two of us. Then the waitress brought our check and fortune cookies. Waitress asked how the check should be divided. Used to Blane, I said, "Separate" and Mr. J. looked at me and said, "I'd like to take care of this, if you don't mind." Did I mind?!? Hell, no, I didn't mind!!

Then, the only small red flag: We all got our fortune cookies and went around the table, taking turns reading our fortunes out loud. Somehow, when we came to Mr. J., he managed to do something socially subtle but it was clear he was distracting us from the fact that he didn't want to read his fortune out loud. I was kind of bummed: Was this a "too cool for school" type of guy? Just a generic party-pooper? Or perhaps he belonged to some super-scary cult that forbid the reading of the future because only Master Moonbeam or whoever can tell the future.

Months later, I asked Mr. J. why he didn't read his fortune out loud. "I still have it," he said. I was flabbergasted. "You do?" He nodded. "Why?" He replied, "Because it read, 'A great romance is about to enter your life,' and I liked you so I didn't want to freak you out."

Gotta love him!



Blogger Kai said...

Love the new series! A man who doesn't tease you for your bird fear AND picks up the check?? How did you get so lucky??! LOL

November 09, 2006 4:48 PM  
Blogger maikaojai said...

You know, you're going to create a rabid Mr. J online fan club if you keep this up...or was that your plan all along?

What a great guy! And to have such social skills on the first date! I'm always impressed with people who can handle new and awkward social situations with grace.

November 09, 2006 6:05 PM  
Blogger Art Nerd Lauren said...

Awww, what a tale! I would write about Kev's and my romance, but how interesting are a couple of teenagers, anyway?

PS I'm totally freaked out by birds, too. And I'm allergic to feathers. Double ouch

November 09, 2006 6:48 PM  
Blogger That Girl said...

You just have elicited a collective "ahhhhh" among your readers. And what is it about J...perhaps my Big J and your Mr. J were separated at birth. This is a man who has told me time and again that his job is to back me up and make sure I have every support I need to finish my dissertation. Gotta love that!

November 09, 2006 7:39 PM  
Blogger Moobs said...

Oh he is GOOD

November 09, 2006 7:59 PM  
Blogger Shawnee said...

Awwww . . . great ending!

November 09, 2006 8:01 PM  
Blogger Jess said...

I've read this several times now and it melts me every time.

November 10, 2006 2:25 AM  
Blogger happychyck said...

That is just so sweet!

November 10, 2006 7:33 AM  
Blogger Kat said...

I am so happy that there is a new series. I hate birds too, they are so unpredictable. I have so many insane bird stories but I won't share because just reading that b-word twice already may have made you run away from your computer screaming.

November 10, 2006 8:39 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Ca said...

That fortune cookie part of the story is adorable. He sounds like a definite keeper!

November 10, 2006 10:58 AM  
Blogger Jhianna said...

Awwww! I'm with maikaojai - you're going to have a Mr. J fan club soon.

I'm going to have to troll the memory banks to come up with some Hubby awww moments.

November 10, 2006 1:33 PM  
Blogger The "Mind" said...

Awww. That is so sweet!

November 10, 2006 3:48 PM  
Blogger Fraulein N said...

Am dead. Because I just melted. That is sooo sweet!

November 14, 2006 9:16 AM  
Blogger Peach said...

OMG LOVE IT lol he is so sweet! you are so lucky

January 16, 2007 3:18 PM  

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